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27 January 牛30 December trip clips26 July The color of life If you know you only have tow more years to live, what the color of your life will or should be? Randy Pausch, a CMU professor who fought against his pancreatic cancer for two years, died on July 25th 2008. Last September I happened to watched his Last Lecture speech online. It's absolutely touching and inspiring. Almost one year apart, this lecture has changed millions of lives. During his last days, he lived in the very essence of life: peeling off all the "things", the money and the fame, and letting only love and passion shine. This is the link to a series of interviews to Randy from ABC. http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/LastLecture/ In memory of Randy Pausch. 22 April A poem A poem, which was said to be published by Washington Post. When we were the Sick Man of Asia, We were called The Yellow Peril. When we are billed to be the next Superpower, we are called The Threat. When we closed our doors, you smuggled drugs to open markets. When we embrace Free Trade, You blame us for taking away your jobs. When we were falling apart, You marched in your troops and wanted your fair share. When we tried to put the broken pieces back together again, Free Tibet you screamed, It Was an Invasion! When tried Communism, you hated us for being Communist. When we embrace Capitalism, you hate us for being Capitalist. When we have a billion people, you said we were destroying the planet. When we tried limiting our numbers, you said we abused human rights. When we were poor, you thought we were dogs. When we loan you cash, you blame us for your national debts. When we build our industries, you call us Polluters. When we sell you goods, you blame us for global warming. When we buy oil, you call it exploitation and genocide. When you go to war for oil, you call it liberation. When we were lost in chaos and rampage, you demanded rules of law. When we uphold law and order against violence, you call it violating human rights. When we were silent, you said you wanted us to have free speech. When we are silent no more, you say we are brainwashed-xenophobics. Why do you hate us so much, we asked. No, you answered, we don't hate you. We don't hate you either, But, do you understand us? Of course we do, you said, We have AFP, CNN and BBC's... What do you really want from us? Think hard first, then answer... Because you only get so many chances. Enough is Enough, Enough Hypocrisy for This One World. We want One World, One Dream, and Peace on Earth. This Big Blue Earth is Big Enough for all of Us. 29 March 那些人和岁月回忆就像是透过一杯浓茶看窗外的世界,泛着茶黄,又偶尔会闪过阳光的剔透。触动它的,可能是一个人,一件事,或者几句话。就像几天前,IBM冯总的到访,将三年前的记忆又呈在自己的眼前。那些生活的片断,人物的特写,竟触手可及:
Jim, 上下班报纸不离手的,坚持每周读一本书的文化人,他让我相信工程师一样可以博古通今,指点江山。
Ju Hai, 极具领导才能的IBM形象代言人,在他身上我似乎看到了工作着的魅力,当然还有他在地铁站上介绍他妻子的温柔。如今他已是一支相当规模的领队之一。 Wan总,这个曾经每天都叫嚷着到银行挤兑的愤青,有着一种让我敬仰的反抗世俗的勇气。现在正带着传奇般的,为时半年便修成正果的,横跨太平洋的爱情,在UIUC的玉米地里守望着他的幸福。
Li Xia, 极具亲和力的,踏实稳重的博士大哥,现在正享受着虽无万贯,但有“千金”的生活。 Jean,这是一个我即将离开时才on-board的同事,对他的认识,源自于他的Blog。这是一个每天相机不离手的,怀才,又哭穷的艺术青年。现在正漂在英伦,用相机记录Cambridge的Ph.D 生活。
Chen L, 一个同门师弟,精明能干的他能用毫不含糊的,极具感染力的WS熏陶整个团队。如今终于找到了归宿:身在日本,心在LP。 眼前的冯总,曾是一个语速极快的笑面佛,现在说话沉缓了很多,也许是因为带领着30多人的队伍的历练,当然也可能因为爱情的滋润。
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每个人都在自己的时间轴上演绎着自己的生活,或许平淡,但透过时间的截面纵观生活,那些点点滴滴所积累的起伏或许会让人吃惊。想想自己,三年的时间在我身上并没有留下太多的印记。虽然我也渴望一个港湾,一个家园,但如果生活终究不愿让我驻足,我将依旧背起行囊,迎着风,穿过那些已经或者将要成为记忆的片段,继续前行。。。 18 March 如果风知道 v2这首诗被比我更能称为诗人的人做了些修改。以下是修改过后的版本:
如果风知道 (version 2)
by JJ & ZZ 三月的风,拂醒点点绿苗, 沉睡的草,闪烁生命的娇娆, 你撩拨琴弦的双手,抚去树枝的寂寥; 花香抖落,月影飘摇。 我迎风向你远眺, 你的背影仍然飘渺。 我展开双臂向你拥抱, 却搂不住你的笑。 如果风知道, 就别让思念继续发酵, 卷起时光一缕,停在你的发梢。 如果风知道, 就化了禁锢希望的牢, 拂动梦的翅膀,带你去天涯海角。 如果风知道, 就吹开心中的祈祷, 化作柳絮,向你飘…… 15 March 如果风知道--初春剪影13 January 随想2008在又一个岁月轮回的结合口,思绪总是那么的不定,再加上一点点时差反应,整个人好像梦游在云里雾里,时光错位。
就像送走朋友后,回到空荡荡的屋里,电脑正使劲的唱着“光阴的故事”,记忆中父母的笑容,朋友的婚礼,初次的心动,难忘的对视,以及那些为梦想奋斗的激情岁月,犹如落叶一般带着泥土的气息洒满这寂寥的房间。惆怅,激动,失落,迷茫,青涩...一并涌来,五味陈杂。凝视窗外夜空,任凭着音符和记忆的碎片渗透自己缥缈的身体,良久,换来的是一个带着颤的深呼吸。往事已去,曾经为之骄傲的奋斗的激情似乎也渐渐得离我而去,未来永不谢幕,却找不到心在何处。
想起回国时刚认识的朋友。他和我一般年纪,从北京学装裱手艺回来后,开了自己的装裱工作室。在我表明来意后,他很爽快地教给我装裱的整套流程,并让我亲手练习了前段工序。很快我们就相谈甚欢,我问他,未来有什么打算。他点点头,说他不想一直就这样自己一个人干下去,他想做企业管理,希望能把这个工作室做大,做成一个企业。他还想学书法,国画,他笑笑说,虽然他会做装裱但字画都不怎么会。他停了停,又说,他现在最想要学的是英语,希望有一天能去美国旅游,他有一个表姐在南加州。他想要学的我都拥有,然而我却羡慕他的事业蓝图。小小的工作室,已是文人墨客,企管政要聚会场所。当我还在为自己的学位挣扎时,他已经在夯实自己的人脉基础,一步一个脚印的构建自己的蓝图。曾经以为自己是很有理想的人,梦想着能改变世界,现在想想那其实就像海市蜃楼一样虚无。就像一句话说得那样,很多人都想着改变世界,却很少有人想到改变自己。
是该改变自己了,现实点,扎实点,执著点,宽容点,洒脱点,微笑点,守住激情,放飞梦想。很快又是一个学期的开始,希望这不再是简单的轮回。
17 December Early Winter@Zilker Park Just a few pictures recently took from Zilker Park, which is one of the many reasons why I love Austin. Enjoy! 10 December 砸车吧,碎碎平安早上天有点阴,出门有点晚。可是一出门,park的一个工作人员从楼梯下冲上来,使劲的跟我打了一个招呼,让我受宠若惊,直觉有点不妙。然后他说,"Your car was broken into." 冲下去一看,后车窗已被砸得粉碎,车内已被搞得一团糟,座椅已被放到躺姿,想象得出来,那家伙还挺享受。
虽然这车不新,但一直挺照顾我。前一天还因为车胎的rim被擦出几道口子而让我心痛不已,看到现在这个样子,口中第一次如此响亮的冲出了F word.
然后,来美之后第一次call police,做report,一小时之后,来了一个警察MM,依次给跟我有类似遭遇的非洲兄弟的车和我的车采指纹。看着车门上那么多指纹我很好奇的问她,"how do you know which one is which?","Well...." 讲了一大堆,但最后一个意思是,看运气,很无奈。那非洲兄弟显然比我激动得多,讲着一口估计是法国腔的英语没停过,很显然,他觉得leasing office要负一定的责任,于是动员我和他的一个伦敦过来的黑人哥们(此人的车载CD Drive 两周前被撬)去office 理论。最后的结论是:"This happens every Christmas Season, these guys want to shop in your cars. It happens all around the city, all aournd the state, all around the country. ""We are living in a crazy world. What you can do? Don't leave important stuff in your car. Leave your car unlocked so they can get in without breaking the window."
All right, great! 砸吧,碎碎平安!
03 December Town Lake, 秋一轮斜阳,染红片片云彩; 从未在傍晚,游走于Town Lake的北岸,没想到,深秋的湖畔,亦有一番国画的韵味。躺在铺满落叶的草地上,风拂过,满耳都是树叶的耳语。 22 November 工作与生活的态度感谢Kingsky转给我的这篇文章。文章的原题如此,可以说对待工作与生活的态度,也就是对待人生的态度,因为人生简单的说就是工作与生活的集合。
30 September "You and Your Research"深夜12点,当我按下finalize you paper的button,我的心如释重负,倒并不是因为achieve了什么,而是觉得过去太多的挣扎,现在终于可以解脱。很自然的,我开始反思,开始展望,在这个断点上,我要为自己新的起点补充精神能量。无意中,再一次的翻开了Richard Hamming的“you and your research”。 记得第一次看的时候,自己踌躇满志,看完之后感觉似乎就是一个老头在说教。然而现在,同样的文章,不同的心境,这个老头的激情说教给我的感觉是wakening: "each of you has one life to live...Why shouldn’t you do significant things in this one life"."I say, why shouldn’t you set out to do something significant. You don’t have to tell other people, but shouldn’t you say to yourself, 'Yes, I would like to do something significant.'" 恩,这久违了的激情。。。 03 September 旅途归来之LV东太平洋温柔的海风实在是没有什么穿透力,在SD的野生动物园我们已感到沙漠般的炎热与荒凉。驱车东进,更是经历了从阔叶林到灌木丛到荒草地再到寸草不生的岩石沙砾。车子以85mile/h的速度欢奔,在快接近LV的时候,看到了一个Waterpark,接着出现了一个高尔夫球场,昭示着LV的奢华:沙漠算什么,我照样玩瀑布,耍高尔夫球棍。
很快就到了South Point,离主街Strip不远的新开的酒店,开始了为期两天的LV小资生活,确切的说是腐败生活:
一日三餐的Buffet,从Le Village到The Buffet, oyster和king crab吃到要吐。酒足饭饱,穿梭于各大Casino之间,任凭老虎机“当当当。。”的声响刺激自己的肾上腺。眼前不时有hot无比的兔女郎闪过,让人怀疑老谋子拍黄金甲的灵感是否源自于此。高雅处,赏一段Bellagio的音乐喷泉,那水柱竟有如生命似的,将音乐演绎的活灵活现,荡气回肠。兴浓处,观一场Jubilee Topless show,表演并不色情,但足以挑逗你的荷尔蒙。睡觉前,一杯cocktail,脸色微红的趴在床上,享受着Queensize的大床和42寸液晶电视,就差叫美女来做马杀鸡了。。。 31 August 旅途归来之LA,SDSouthwest, 公交一样到站停靠的航班,我们几个习惯了国际航班下机中转的人,一下愣没适应过来。
LAX,大,大的可怕和杂乱,借辆小推车就要3刀,租个车还要坐BUS将近30分钟,比起Austin机场,实在没人性。
在开往SD的一号公路上,加州的风情开始渐渐显现,晒着灿烂但温和的阳光,吹着东太平洋的海风,赏着连绵不绝的海岸风景,心中默念道,“ND, 这真是人住的地方!”
正当有些审美疲劳,车子拐进了传说中的La Jolla beach,突然发觉我们这辆Dodge的caravan已穿梭与BMW和porsche的跑车之间,土得掉渣。前方一排参天的椰子树,苗条又挺拔,夕阳游荡在树干之间,撒落在草坪上。草坪上,帅哥美女,三三两两。不远处,便是闪着金光的太平洋,海鸥掠过海面,阵阵欢叫伴着涛声随着海风向你涌来。一声Wow..之后发觉自己患上了失语症。。。。。
17 August recharging battery....summer is gone...
Not a rewarding summer, a little depressed
Cause the most rewarding thing I had was to find out that I spent half a year barking on a wrong tree.
Is this what research looks like?
At least I can use that to comfort myself.
Well, this is it. No matter what, I am gonna enjoy my LA,SD,LV trip.
Recharge battery for the next strive.....
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